You're good! For now.

This week's appointment was Wednesday, but I've been non-stop running around this week. That's why this blog is courtesy of 6AM, Completed Chores, COFFEE!, and a quiet house with kids sleeping.

I went into this week's appointment expecting to go over the homework of how I would deal with Procrastination.  I may have written the homework a mere hours before the appointment. 

But we didn't talk about that.

Instead we just Talked.  My interests, my hobbies..  What are my stress relievers, my go-tos.  How is my circle of friends doing?  How's the foundation?


Turns out, she also crochets, which is nice.  We shared pictures, talked about the kids, etc..

"You're good, for now." She says.

What?  I'm okay?  ME?  There was a good hearty laugh.


My stress levels are currently at a low.  I'm managing my anxiety and depression.  Apparently, I'm at DEFCON LOW or GREEN, or something?

 

Well, maybe Guarded is a better option.  DEFCON Guarded.   Sounds like a good stance for me.

I don't need to see her for 2 weeks this time.  I'm honestly not sure how I feel about that.  I've come to really enjoy these sessions.  Having someone make me focus on me instead of the trillion other things going through my head.   And if I would start to change the focus, she'd bring me back.

Not everything or everyone in life is under my control.  The only person under my control is Me.  I have to be responsible for me first before anything else.  If I am good, if my foundation is good, then I can be that person for others.  The stronger my foundation is, the more I can take on.  Because I'm strong.

Interestingly enough (and maybe you know me, or maybe I've said this part before), I'm great most of the time.  I can take on the world.  I can be the most loyal of friends, the big mama bear for my kids, the pillar that holds everything up.  I can be that. 

I am that.  

But there are things that I have been dealing with that have just disrupted everything.  Cracks in the foundation.  A few little problems, a few little (big) things, and my whole structure, my whole core has weakened.

These sessions are helping me patch and fix all those cracks.  It isn't like we can just put a band-aid on things and be done with it.  Some parts need to be completely demolished the rest of the way and rebuilt.

Hmm.  Writing that out actually makes it make even more sense to me.  I'm not going through a crisis.  I'm going through a REMODEL!

This needs to be a new code word. 

How are you doing?

Great, I'm remodeling...

Anyone else remodeling? Remodeling works so much better when you have friends there to help share the work load.  Those friends who would drop everything for you and give you their greatest gift - TIME.  Those are the ones you need to ask. 

You should try that if you haven't already.   A few great friends are worth more than 100s of random friends and acquaintances..

My next appointment is the week before Nerdtacular.  I'll try and get a blog post in next week anyway and check in.

Until then..

Saisri