My Journey to destroy depression - or at least my own.

Firstly, thank you to everyone who is stopping by to read all this..

I want to start with my tweets from Tuesday that began everything.  I'm just going to copy the text instead of having all the pictures here.. 


Tweets from 4/21/15 but smushed together into actual paragraphs instead of 140 char limits:

I've been very vocal on my thoughts and opinions on depression, and so I'm going to share my continuing saga.

The last I said on it was that I've been self-managing myself - meaning, working on my issues without outside help of dr or drug currently.

Not judging medicines. Everyone's situation is different. I've self-managed for several years and have always had a good grasp of where I'm at emotionally or mentally.  Sometimes, though, being strong doesn't mean doing it yourself.  Sometimes being strong means asking for help. And that is completely ok!

I called up my doctor today and I'll be seeing him on Thursday. This is what I need right now. And it's ok, too!

Know what you can handle and what you can't and never forget to reach out when you can't!

I'll update when I have more info, but feel free to reach out to me if you need to chat (or to anyone if you don't want to talk to me! :) )

And now for the continuation!

Let me tell you how a normal appointment goes with my doctor.  I walk in with a smile. I say hi to everyone make jokes about my weight when I'm on the scale.  When the MA comes in, we laugh and joke.  When the doctor comes in, other than the handshake, we sound like 2 old friends catching up.  We each with our sarcasm go through whatever ailment brought me in, we agree on a plan, and we part ways..


This morning was different. I went in like normal, but when the nice MA came in to do her portion and asked what I was in for, I kept smiling but my voice broke.  Sweet as can be, she asked all her items, and then left me with a smile and a "Hope you feel better soon!"  (I love this office).

I was prepared this time to let my doctor see that I'm not okay.  When he came in, he knew instantly - INSTANTLY- that something was wrong.

He then asked me what's been going on.  And do you know what I did?  I told him the truth.

(Sounds obvious, but this is really important.  If you can admit to your doctor that something is wrong, they can't help you.  You have to help them help you by being Honest.)

We had a good 35-40 min chat?  He would ask questions, and I would answer them and tell him how I was feeling.  He would listen intently and ask more questions...all the while jotting things down.

(They do have to document so that if this is prolonged, they can see your growth or triggers or whatever it is they are looking for.)

As we were winding down, I was feeling better.  Someone who might actually be able to help me and was focused on solely me - and if you know me, that's a big deal..

He did prescribe Zoloft for now.  I knew he would.  I clearly need help right now.  I'm not able to do it on my own like I normally do.  I gratefully accepted the prescription.

He also recommended me to see a therapist he knows and respects.  That I also knew was coming.  If he hadn't offered it to me, I was going to ask.  The medicine will help me with my symptoms, but it won't fix the problem.

EDIT - I forgot to mention.  He also ordered a full lab workup done for blood tests.  As he said, he wants to rule out anything "organic." - meaning, is there something else causing my symptoms.

So that's where I'm at right now.  I began my Zoloft today (generic of course. Not brand. Brand names are expensive!)

I called and left a message at his therapist friend's practice.  I'll follow up with that again and do some of my own homework there.

I am sure there will be more to come, but that sums up today.


(Side Note - I am a HUGE proponent of always telling your PCP everything, including what you see other doctors for.  The more they know, and the better they know you, the faster they can get to the bottom of what is going on.)